clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Celtic Anonymous V Jucojames : The Bout To Knock The Other Guy Out.

Whoever wins we lose.

St. Johnstone v Celtic - Ladbrokes Scottish Premiership Photo by Mark Runnacles/Getty Images

First off, I want to let everyone know I’m sorry it’s came to this. A blog about a ‘Twitter Beef’. It really is the lowest of the low but, these are troubling times, in a unique year, where anything seems possible. Furthermore, it’s international break, so can you blame me for this gutter level filler ?

Throughout the years there’s been numerous wars and battles, fictional and non fictional, that have fascinated me.

The French Revolution paved the way to the modern ‘democracy’ age we live in, moving away from the era of monarchies and theocracies. The Cold War also, was a fascinating era in history, wherein the USSR and USA were strategically poised to take advantage of the war’s aftermath for economic and political gain, but both were wary of one another since the USSR espoused communism, while the United States championed capitalism.

Lest we also forget, the fall of Kings Landing, where Daenerys finally managed to get the Lannister forces to submit and surrender to her army, only to lose the nut and decimate an entire city just because the sound of some bells got to her and she lost the run of herself.

Nowadays, we’re in a global war with a virus that is wreaking havoc on our daily lives. I refer to COVID-19 and not myself in this instance. During this pandemic, the social impact has led to various battles being fought online, which as a grown man with a family and responsibilities, I can only look on at in sheer confusion and wonder where this current conflict is going to rank in the history books when the bloodshed is over.

I’m used to seeing the odd ‘spat’ on Twitter which is, rightly, forgotten about in an hour but this current STAT WAR between ‘Celtic FC Analytics’ and ‘Juco James’ is quite something.

It all started on October 6th, after the closure of the transfer window and our win in Perth.

Mr James started a Twitter thread, which a lot of people are into just now, to highlight what he felt was Celtic being weaker after the transfer window slammed shut, despite keeping our key players and adding a fair bit of quality to the team, spending a considerable amount of money in the process.

As always, people with big mouths quoted it, being cheeky, possibly bordering on outright disrespectful and the nature of Twitter is that, it’s not real life, there’s no consequences and something else will come along in minutes to distract you from that bitesized opinion you held that, at the time, was earth shattering.

Step forward Celtic FC Analytics, who took it upon himself/herself/themselves to dish out a legdrop so severe on Mr James, that it would hospitalise Hulk Hogan himself if he was in the same state as the victim it was intended for.

So, on that very fateful day on October 6th, both accounts are likely to have a go at each other, and the next day, the anonymous account is shut down, and Mr James goes onto compile more threads about the xC of the sausage suppers that Scott Brown will be consuming during the international break.

But no. This rumbles on. Juco James accuses the anonymous account of being......connected to Celtic!

Then Celtic FC Analytics, if you can still keep up, tweets this which can only throw in the schmozz angle, where somehow Mr James is associated with, eh.....Neil McCann.

As I type this, Colleen Rooney has just phoned Rebekah Vardy asking if she’s seen this patter, and is mortified for all involved. I don’t know what Vardy has said but Piers Morgan should be able to inform me after he’s got details from her phone soon.

So as it stands today, the Quote RT Battle is at a standstill. Much like the famous Christmas truce of the 1914 world war, both parties have stood down.

It leads me to now question the true enemy of this war.....Celtic FC firstly, for causing this level of pettiness between fans by refusing to play fluid, attractive football and letting this ‘debate’ even be founded because of the stale performances and the complacency of us in general, allowing ourselves to decline on the global stage and again, only be obsessed with dominating in Scotland. Although at least we’re not on the same tier as Arsenal supporters, which is a consolation.

And secondly, Twitter, for continuing to be a tiresome platform, allowing people like me to post articles out on there, although thankfully it’s NewsNow that is the true ally to this monumental blog.

Will the club address this accusation and put it to bed at some point today ? Probably not.

Will they ever ? I doubt it.

Is this just magnified because Celtic aren’t playing for another nine days ? Absolutely.

“The world is a fine place and worth fighting for.”

I agree with the second part.