Tomorrow we face Rennes, so here’s the definitive TJDS preview of the game, where I answer my own questions because I have severe mental health problems.
So without further apu, here we go!
‘Rennes eh ? Tell me about them if you are some know it all.’
I am not a know it all. Apart from always calling it right with Celtic scores. You should know about them though. They are hardly obscure, and currently lie in second place in the French league. By all accounts, they live up to the lazy stereotype of ‘FRENCH CRACKS’
‘Right well, how’s their general form going into this game?’
They lost 2-1 at home to Nice a couple of weeks ago, and then on Sunday they drew 0-0 away to Brest. It’s hardly Piper Alpha right enough, but they’re not exactly in red hot form and we shouldn’t be fearing them. More can be heard about their recent displays by listening to the Four Tims Pod who had a Rennes fan on there.
‘Have we played these clowns before?’
We have indeed you ignoramus, twice in 2011. A superb Cha Du Ri own goal put the hosts head in the first game, before Joe Ledley’s equaliser. In the return match at Celtic Park. we smashed them 3-1, but it wasn’t enough to get us through the group.
‘Anyone that stands out for them?’
They have a sixteen year old who is brilliant, Eduardo Camavinga , but hopefully we can bully him and possibly damage his career tomorrow night, and we’ll be all for that as long as we get a result by any means necessary. That Niang guy may be injured as well, the boy who played for Milan, but there’s no real superstars on their books, and I’d say Celtic have better players man for man, but then I’d say that if we played Liverpool or Man City, because I am back to being brainwashed again after we beat Rangers at Ibrox and suddenly assume we’re the best team in the world once more. What a flip flop eh.
‘Right so, what’s the shoot prediction going to be bawjaws?’
Don’t ever talk to me like that again, and ask that again, properly.
‘Sorry. What will the shoot prediction be for tomorrow, legend?’
Thanks for that. I think tomorrow it will be.........Rennes 2-2 Celtic.
Rennes v Celtic
UEFA Europa League Group Stage
BT Sport 3 / BT Sport Ultimate